Evil Sandwich

The Evil Sandwich is the most diabolical sandwich to ever exist. It is estimated that the Evil Sandwich is responsible for 2-3 million deaths. The Evil Sandwich was created with the sole purpose of cruelty. The true form of the Evil Sandwich cannot be fully comprehended by mere mortal minds, and so a full description of the ingredients is impossible. The Evil Sandwich predates humanity and the concept of sandwiches, and may also predate the universe itself. The Evil Sandwich is is most likely from a different universe, and passed into our own via unknown technology or magic.

Creation and Dominion over Our Universe
The Evil Sandwich was birthed from pure hate billions of years ago. Over the course of millenia, it grew in power by devouring the souls of the living, travelling the different planes of existence in search for more food. When our universe was created, the Evil Sandwich travelled to our new dimension and made it it's new home. Thus, the Evil Sandwich is the most powerful diety in our universe, possibly even the multiverse.

The Dawn of Humanity
For billions of years the Evil Sandwich remained the only intelligent being in all of the universe. The Evil Sandwich enjoyed being ruler of all, and took great pleasure in torturing the lesser creatures. It was the Evil Sandwich who destroyed the dinosaurs. So, when humanity first appeared, it angered the Evil Sandwich to see creatures acting of their own free will. So in response, the Evil Sandwich spawned the many demons and devils that roam the Earth and outer planes, with the sole intent of inflicting suffering on humanity

Ancient Egypt and Pyramids
As humanity progressed and the demons failed to dominate completely, the Evil Sandwich took human form for the first time. In Egypt, the Evil Sandwich appeared as a benevolent god, Ra. He took both human form and the form of the sun, and tricked the humans there into swearing loyalty to him. It was the Evil Sandwich who convinced the Egyptians to construct the pyramind, which would act as a vessel of transportation for the Evil Sandwich between Earth and the outer reaches of the universe. The Evil Sandwich would travel to many civilizations, building more pyramids for travel.

Ancient Greece
Ironically, the savior for humanity was war and destruction. When the Greeks invaded Egypt, The Evil Sandwich lost dominion of the men that served him. This angered him, so he sent plague demons to Earth, and many died. This brought joy to the Evil Sandwich, who decided to delay the total destruction of humanity, as he enjoyed their long suffering. However powerful, the Evil Sandwich had no dominion over the dead, and the dead could not suffer. So he decided to wait until the next opprotunity to strike.

The Fall of Rome and the Dark Age
For a time, the Evil Sandwich did not bother humanity. Though his sandwich demons still caused plague and war, humanity progressed and life improved. This was too much for the Evil Sandwich, who decided to attack. War erupted all throughout the world, and the great empires of old fell. Knowledge was lost, and for a thousand years humanity lived in the dark ages. The bubonic plague was created to test the strength of humanity, and they were brought to theur knees. It would not take much more to destroy humanity.

The Disappearance of the Evil Sandwich
The Evil Sandwich held back his attacks, and humanity was given a chance to recover. Old knowledge was rediscovered, and a hundred years of prsoperity led to life being the best it ever had. The Evil Sandwich lies in deep slumber, waiting for the perfect moment to destroy humanity.

Speculation on the Evil Sandwich
The Evil Sandwich is most likely a chicken parm.